Still No House OR Why I am Slowly Going Insane in 2011

So it’s been a while since anyone’s heard from me about this whole house thing. Mostly because I don’t freaking have it yet.

Interest rates have gone up, my loan is up in the air, my credit is less awesome than when I started and the whole thing is backed up because of clerical, bureaucratic bullshit. All we need is a judge to sign some stupid letters that he ruled a month and a half ago that he was going to sign and… Nothing. The courts are backed up is all my lawyer and the mostly MIA agents will tell me.

Pretty sure I only heard a peep from the realtor because she’s changing her email address. Maybe I’m getting cynical. I’m sure she really wanted to check in. That’s why she sent that completely insensitive email last month about how it’s taking longer for loans to close and that rate locks are expiring with no explanation as to why she sent it and I, of course being the insane, overly sensitive, and angry person I am, wrote back and told her she knew I wasn’t near closing a loan yet and how could I even be thinking about this now, and did she have any status updates about the house.

She wrote back one line – I was just informing my clients of what’s going on, not to tell anyone to lock any rates. Smiley emoticon.

Smiley emoticon??

Literally everything I am riding on is in the hands of a judge who can’t sign papers fast enough. Hello signature stamp? Maybe learn to sign with both hands. Being ambidextrous can literally double productivity here. Worth it. I will take a signature that looks like your five year old wrote it. Hell, get your five year old in there. There’s gotta be a take your kid to work day something.

I am taking action into my own hands a bit.  Still fruitless, but at least I feel like I’m doing something.  I confirmed with my attorney that I can get out of the contract at any time because they were supposed to have the letters to me by February 5th.

BUT, why get out of the contract now when I don’t have another house lined up yet?  It’s like putting out your resume while you’re still working at your other job and can’t get your f-ing boss to sign your checks!

Okay, possibly not that dire, but still.

I called back an agent who had been hounding be since before Christmas.  Honestly, I admired his follow up.  So I called him, told him I wanted to see a house he had on the market and the other day, he showed me that house and another house.

When I met him, he shook my hand, led me into the house to sign some papers disclosing that he was the seller’s agent for the house and his obligations were to the seller (how professional), and handed me his business card, the business card of a mortgage broker they worked with, and the business card of an attorney they worked with.

Then he gave me a copy of the disclosures I just signed, along with the one sheets for the houses we were about to see, in, get this, a manila folder! So I could keep everything in order and it wouldn’t get ruined!

Both of the houses we saw turned out to be renovation jobs and one was too far off the J train for me to seriously consider it, but I did walk away feeling like he had a real idea of what I was looking for.

So the next day, because, as we all know, I am insane (only sometimes angry), I spent my lunch hour scouring the internet for houses and sending him links to all of them.  A few days later, I followed up with him on the links I sent.

And now it’s a few days later and still nothing.

I guess I really have to do everything myself.  Whomp whomp.